Comments on: A Letter To Christine And An Apology To The Homeowners Association For Not Mowing My Yard

By: qazse

qazse — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 04:21:40 +0000

When my father died (1981) it seemed so rock hard final – impossibly gone beyond my touch. When I brushed his hair and looked at that body which once spoke to me and went off to work and lay under the car while I handed him tools on a freezing winter night… I realized there was more than just this silent relationship between son and corpse… I became aware this life had vistas I was yet to witness. I knew there was no need to say I’m sorry or I wish. I knew he was in a place of perfect understanding and I smiled with him to this day. That is not to say it was easy, but it was less lonely.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers Clanceyjane.

qazse. your phrase “impossibly gone beyond my touch” silenced me for days. last week i spent some time with my mother’s sisters. it was there, in the midst of them, i caught sight of the vistas and felt less lonely– exactly as you described.

By: writerchick

writerchick — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 16:28:05 +0000

Clancey,
I can only say that I understand so very well how you feel. My father died years ago and I still feel bad about going on without him. I wish there were something I or anyone could say to make the pain go away. Christine is right, she is there in your love for her, your joyous memories, your everyday small actions, the music you listen to – all of it.
hugs,
Annie

i’m sorry for your loss, annie, and very thankful for your support. the day before yesterday, i noticed the crepe myrtles were waking up. yesterday i decided to “fake it til i make it” and i mowed the yard. today i woke to find geese had gathered here on silver lake. the season turns.

By: plditallo

plditallo — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 19:19:09 +0000

Julia and C really do know just what to say--for me, its much more of a struggle! All I can say is... mow the lawn, travel to Fiji, drape yourself in life's experiences--in that zest, you'll find N -- cheering you on! well, pally, you say what you struggle to say very well. i don't feel it quite yet, but i am hopeful that the day will come.

By: c

Mon, 08 Sep 2008 03:08:15 +0000

Oh my dear!
This letter brought tears to my eyes before and now again.

She is here, in your longing, your wild lawn, your ways and memories.
Knowing you, i feel i know a bit of her too.

She’s obviously glorious.

So much love to you.

you say everything just right. thank you for it.

and you know what else? i think she has something to do with the frogs that keep popping up in odd places at odd times.

By: Julia Gordon-Bramer

Julia Gordon-Bramer — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 01:55:08 +0000

I wish that I could come over and mow your yard for you.

Don’t worry about staying in Unionville. She’ll follow you wherever you go.

I’m sure of it.

I have proof. Some friends and loved ones never really left me. I’m being serious.

xo, Julia

“she’ll follow me wherever i go”. thanks, julia. i’m counting on that.